Forever

I can't promise you forever
Cause I know that a promise I can't keep
I can't say I'll always be your friend
Cause I can't promise that either
I can't say we'll never break our friendship
Or that we'll always be together
Cause, that too is a promise I can't keep
I can't promise that we won't lose touch
Cause maybe we will
I don't know whats coming up for me in life
I don't see my future
I don't know the places I'll go
The things I'll go through
I don't know what will happen tomorrow,
Or even the things I'll say today
But, God does...
I don't know the plans that God has laid before me
I don't know what he wants to do with my life
Or what he will put me through
I don't know if I will know you forever
Or if one day our friendship will end
I can't make a promise that we'll always be friend
Cause I'm not sure if I can keep that promise
But the promise I'll give you is this..
I'll be the friend that I can be to you
Until the time when God tells me my times up here
I'll be the best friend that I can to you
Until we part
I don't know what's going to happen in my future
But, I know God does
And I trust that his plans are better then my own
I won't make a promise to you that I know I can't keep
Forever is one of those
But I will promise you,
That I'll be the best friend that I can
For the time I am lucky enough to be with you
I know I won't be a perfect friend
I know I'll mess up
I won't promise you I'll be a perfect friend
Cause that is one thing I know I can't keep
I'll try my best, give my best effort
But there will be a time I will have to part
I don't know what it is but there will be a time
But if you want a friend that will never leave you,
Don't chose me, or any person
Chose God
He'll never leave you
He'll always be by your side
And he can promise you the things I can't
He'll always be there...
Forever
I won't be, I won't say I will, cause I know I won't
But God will never leave you, he'll be with you forever
He can promise you forever
He's the best friend you could ever ask for
Lean on him
He's sturdy and won't fall
I can't promise forever,
But God can

Yup... This is dumb

It's a game we all like to play
It's a world we like to fake
It's the truth we want to hide
It's the pain we don't show inside
It's the mask we chose to wear
So we don't have to show our tears
It's a choice we have to make
If we chose to fake
We like to fake it cause it seems easier
We like to play these game
And make the world believe us
You may say you've got it all
When really you have nothing
You can come to me with a mask
You can hide all you want from me
But you can't hide it from God
He knows it all
And no matter how hard you try to hide it,
It won't work
You can hide it from me
I can't make you show it to me
You can only chose to
I know I may not understand you or your pain,
But God does
He'll listen
He loves you
Your his child
And when you fall he'll catch you
When you cry, he'll catch each tear in his hand
You can't hide it from him
You can't hide the facts of what he already knows
You can fake it with me, but you can't fake it with the one who created you
With a plan and a purpose

Stupid Once Again

This thing is can be both painful and fun
It can be hard and easy
Stressful or not a care in the world
Happy or sad
Glad or mad
It can be fun and not so fun
Each and every person has one
And this things called life.

God breathed life into each and everyone of us, but that wasn't the life I was talking about. Yes, it's the life that your walking and breathing. But, it's not that kind of life. It's the life in which you take each step, and you can either go and do this or that. Life can turn out this way, or that way. It could be hard, or it could be easy.

But, I can tell ya, my life wasn't what you'd call easy for the longest time. You see, I like control, I like being able to control myself and chose what I want to do and where I want to go. I want MY WILL, I want MY PLAN in life, I don't want to follow God's, mines better. There's a beginning, and I know what I'm planning in the near future. Yeah, I love that power, I love the control of being able to control this thing called life.

But, God doesn't seem to follow that plan. He seems to not care about my plans, but has plans of His own. he doesn't really seem to care about what I want, he just does what he wants. He decides he wants me to fall, he lets me, he decide to put me through this, and does, and I don't even have a say in it.

It's so much easier, to slam him out, let him go, drop him off on the curb a few feet back. It's so much easier to take the wheel for ourselves, and go just where we want to, where we planned. I hate to be the one to break it to you, but you'll never get what you want, you'll never get your will, but you'll get God's. '

If I had a choice, I wouldn't live the life I life right now. It's painful and hard at time, it's a big pain, and sometimes I just want out, but don't we all. Sometimes it feels like all God's doing is making me go through all this hard stuff, and there is nothing good in life, but that's when God surprises you.

The truth is, is that we have to be able to let go of that control, let go of our own lives, let go of the burdens and pains that we hold so tightly, that we try so hard to hide from God. (how dumb are we?) We can't hide anything from God, he knows everything, including your future. He knows what you want, and he knows what will happen. He knows that there will be pain, but he also sees what's ahead.

It's so easy for us to just take control, but we have to come to the cross, come to Jesus' face, take the things we hold, take our own life, and lay it down. And maybe your running from God right now, and maybe your tight with him. But for those of you who are drifting away, is it time for you to come home to your Father's open arms? Is it time for you to lay it all down at his feet? Is it time to let go of what you hold on to and let God take control?

I don't know your life story, but I do know one thing, and it's this... no matter how hard it is, no matter where you are, God has a plan for your life, and maybe it's not your will being done, but I hate to be the one to break it to you, but it will never be your will, but it will be God's will all the way.

You

I could tell you a sad, sad story, about a girl just like you and me
Or I could sing you a happy song of how I was rescued

I could tell you about the pain and hurt
Or I could tell you about the smile after

I could tell you how I was rescued
Or I could tell you how much it hurt

I could tell you it's easy
Or I could tell you it's hard

I could tell you, you like power, and control
I could tell you, I do too

But, I don't have control, and guess who does?
God does.

He created me
He made me
He wants to use me, if only I'd let him

I take my life, hold it on my hands,
I lay it down, down at your feet
I let go of the pain, the hurt, the things I've held so tight
I lay it all at your feet.


That was stupid. Okay yeah, don't ask.

You Don't Understand

You don't understand what I've been through.
You don't see all the tears I've cried.
You don't see all the times when a little word can hurt me so much.
You don't understand how hard life can be.
You don't understand the pain.
You don't understand the hurt,
you don't know what it's like to have to lie to everyone about what goes on.

You don't understand
You'll never know
You don't understand how much it hurts to be me

You haven't seen the least of it
You don't know how much it hurts me
You've never seen me cry,
You've never seen my true pain

You'll never know till you've been there
You'll never know how hard it is to endure pain,
Until you've been there
You'll never know my pain until your there
and wish you could get out

You'll never know true pain till you feel it
You'll never understand how hard it is to fake it
You'll never understand cause your not me

You'll never know my pain
You'll never understand it
You'll never see the uncried tears
You'll never know my pain

-lyrics by Annoymous.

Yesterday

I was reading my Bible yesterday (wow shocker I know, I can read!:) ) I was reading a passage in Psalms, and David was praising God, and writing a Psalm of thanksgiving to the Lord. It got me to thinking, I am so greedy. I take everything for granted that God has given me. I don't think twice about the little thing in life, or being thankful for them.

Like each morning when I get up, that I can see, hear, walk, that I can move. The I can live and breathe, and that when I get up out of that nice bed, do I even think twice about being able to live in a warm house, and not having to sleep on concrete, but I get a nice bed. When I walk out into the nice day outside, do I even think about how I am so lucky to be able to get into a car, and drive to a nice school with great teachers, and friends. I never even take the time to say, "thanks God." I just take it all for granted. My family, my friends, the "little" things like being able to walk and breathe and move.

I look at my life, and all I see is the bad things that have gone on, the hard days, the bad things in life, the things that go wrong, and I go and blame God for them. I get mad at God for the little things that go wrong, and the good I just forget. The good things in life, the simple good things, I just forget about. The bad is all I think about, the good is just whatever. But when you think about it, God has blessed us with so much. And when I look at my life, I see so many great things. When I just take the time to look around, I have so much compared to so many people.

I'm just talking, writing, whatever... nothing important. But whatever.