Bad now, good later. Good now, bad later.

Bad time come, and bad times go... for some people they come all the time, for some almost never, but for those of you who to you it seems like you are always having bad days, don't worry I know where you are at. How many people think that bad days are fun? Most people, would say they are just plain BAD! Hence the name... BAD DAYS... but they come and go, for some more often then others, but for me, that is really when God really is at work in me. During hard time, when I am getting yelled at, or feel like no one cares about me.... that is when God always decides to show me something new.

I updated just a few days ago... Tuesday I think, and a lot has been shown to me since then. Let's start with something that I learned Wednesday...

So, yesterday, just wasn't really the best day of my life... if you know what I mean. I went to school, came home, everything was normal. I mean, it wasn't the best day of my life, but nothing too exciting happened. I came home from school, not in the best mood ever. Everything was fine, until I went to church last night. I heard an awesome message being preached, about character. And, so I got to thinking, character... what is my character? Or more... who do people see in me? I have had it said to me that I am awesome and all that, but what about when no one is looking? Who am I? Am I that same person that everyone sees in me, or am I the total opposite? Who do I want to be is a better question?

When I got home from church Wednesday night, I was having a not so good day, and I came home, and just went to finish my homework. And I talked to a friends on IM, and things only got worse. It was an old friend that I hadn't talked to in quite a while, and I just really ticked her off. She asked me, just like a caring friend would, how I was doing, and I said okay. Cause, that was really my answer. Then she asked what's wrong? And even though many things were wrong I answered nothing. She got on my case about this all night, and then not just that, but the next thing I know, my dad comes in and yells at me, and gets all mad at me. So my day went about from a 5 to a 1. Since I was all mad and frustrated, I just decided to leave, and go get ready for bed. I walked up the stairs being mad at myself. For me, it felt like I could do nothing right, and I was all mad and stressed, and just having a horrible day. When I got to my room, I turned on my radio, and something about the right song at the right time... it wasn't even the song, it was just a simple word. God. That's it, that was the word... because then I remember what someone had once told me. That, God had his hand over me, and he would catch me as I fell, and he would catch my tears as they ran down my face, and he made me perfect in His eyes, and cares about me so much. It was just right what I needed. And, that night as I got into bed, my simple one word prayer was "thanks" and that was all I could make out. A sudden feeling of peace came upon me, as I drifted to sleep that night.

Thursday...woke up thinking that today would be a better day. But, it wasn't. Things weren't going so well at home, but I had to put a smile on for school. I went to school with the hopes that my friends would make my day good... but... I mean it was school, and it wasn't too exciting. On Thursdays, since I go to a Christian School, I had chapel. And, we sang a cool song, and had a cool speaker. One thing came to me that day in chapel, and it was this. I have taken control of my own life, and tried to do everything my way. I have taken my life, and I only do things that I think will make me happy. And it simple goes like this...

If you so go, we will go
If you say wait, we will wait
If you say step out on the water and they say it can't be done
We'll fix our eyes on you and we will come

Your ways are higher than our ways
And the plans that You have laid are good and true
If you call us to the fire You will not withdraw your hand
We'll gaze into the flames and look for you

He said one simple line: Good now, bad later. Bad now, good later.

And that just to me really stood out... even though my life isn't always going to be easy, the bad will one day pass away, and the good will come. The words of the song, just hit me hard on Thursday. I have been in control of my life for way too long, and God is the only who really deserves to have that job, because he has awesome plans for my life, and I just have to trust him. My life's control is in God's hands, because I know he has better plans for me then the plans that I had for myself.

So... today... reflect on yourself... what is your character? Does it change from when you are with people and when you are alone? And who has total control over your life? You or God?